ummm, what?

what's the rush moy and giella? are mary and jeff going to run away and move as soon as he gets on the plane? so drew will come back and be like, guys, guys guess what? i'm different, i'm a better man, etc vomit etc... guys? guys? where are you? dr. jeff somehow got younger in the future, or learned about hair dye. he also learned about the color green. either way, makes mary look super old. like, um, hey jeff, teach mary about hair dye too! it will help you start your new lives on the lam from your lame son. who wears mom jeans. all in all, great strip! really maxed it out in terms of background characters. almost, i mean. they could have shoved someone weird in between drs.' cory weird embrace/false threat in panel 2, or between drew and mary's deathgrip on her purse. there's robbers at the airport. or, for that matter between dr. jeff and drew's manpurse in panel 1 - how did i almost miss that? safe flight drew corey!!!!

bizarro

here's what i love about today's strip.

1. drew's crotch is drawn all crazily and extra tall/long/whatever. just looks crazy.

2. mary's pants turned into a skirt. and she's still maintaining a fake pose of shocked-ness at drew's decision.

actually, guess i didn't really explain the title of the post about 2/26's strip, which came up in a hemingway complex discussion about whether or not jeff and mary should be shocked about drew's decision. on the one hand, they've been oh-so-not-subtly telling him to go to vietnam instead of being rich and unsuccessfully hitting on rich ladies in winter/summer wonderlands. i bet moy and giella draw some sweet 80s style ski outfits. and the background characters would have been awesome! maybe they would have tried to draw a rad or hip snowboarder! anyway, we know drew can't really think for himself, so of course he would do what they tell him. on the other hand, drew is the selfishest person not alive, can't even help anyone at his current job, so why would he go? oh well, i'm sure he will be wildly unhelpful and self-centered whatever continent he's on. can't wait!

the selfishest person not alive

several things i love about this strip.

1. a few days later... wtf??!!! advancing time instead of killing us slowly with the same few minutes over and over again and recapped and most of the strip being something that already happened? i know crazy moy and giella have been on fast forward lately but wow. awesome. has mary been sleeping over at dr. jeff's house all this time? does she keep a stock of old lady outfits over there? is she borrowing dr. jeff's favorite salmon sweatshirt and slacks combo?

2. dr. jeff is so boring! mary must be wishing she kept chester right about now because then she would have an excuse not to see him and she could let him think that there was another man in her condo etc etc.

3. what's with the expressions of shock about drew's choice? they've only been hitting him over the head with a vietnam hammer for the past week, and ostensibly continued in the unseen "few days".

well, i guess that's all i love about this strip. actually, only #1 was something i loved. the other 2 were just observations. also in general i love how lame and delusional drew is. he makes me feel better about myself and my lame love life.

Birds attack; Jeff supports

That first panel! Are we still in Mary Worth? Who wrote that? Apparently we're getting into some authentically feelings-based territory here. (As opposed to the usual lunacy-based territory opon which is built Charterstone Condo Complex.)

It seems Jeff and Mary are having two different conversations. Jeff's is, My weird son is fucked up after one date in which he sat at a table. Now he has to change his life and go windsurfing in a foreign country. Mary's all, "I decided that Drew will go to Vietnam." Jeff: I must let him know I'm here for him. Mary: I said Vietnam!

So the characters have been getting out of their condos and into that park pretty regularly these days. Today, something sinister is happening. The man in panel 3: is he feeding the seagulls? Because everyone else is running away from them. The woman in the last two panels - you know who she is, right? That's Vera, breaker of Drew's heart, spastic rider of horses, and A-1 snazzy dresser. She's rushing by Jeff, which is smart, because he is so out to get her. He's gonna make her pay for turning his cartoonishly delighted offspring into a despairing, 65-year-old-looking sad man. That's why he's wearing a sweatsuit. He's bringing a new level of crime not seen in this retirement community since that dog hit-and-run last month.

PS, where is Dawn Weston these days? Last we saw of her, she was all furious on a horse and then going out to dinner with her dad. When is she going to come back with her rage and her fashion choices?

The first panel is sad and platitudinous enough, but that second panel - ! That's where Mary shows her grade-A sadomasochistic chops. Check out the look of deranged fury on her face! And where do you think she vents it? Check out Jeff's look of startled terror! "Lead each other to the necessary lessons . . ." - that's some creepy shit, Mary Worth.

Thankfully, Drew is turned away so he can't see this exchange. Nor can he see that his formerly checkered coat which later turned brown has now turned goldenrod to match the snazzy living room decor. Also, you know those shadow portraits that they do when you're in second grade and a parent helper traces your shadow onto some paper? Their whole family snapshot collection is done in this, um, evocative style.

Has anyone else noticed that Drew, Jeff and Mary are all drawn with basically the same face?

"Drew," he said to his son in a husky voice, "please do what Mary says. Just look around - our man-cabin has pink drapes and Georgia O'Keefe-ish art on the walls. I sit on a goldenrod couch all day and neither of us ever go to our jobs at the hospital. We're not in charge anymore, Drew. If Mary wants you to go to Vietnam and contract an unspecified disease, then that's what needs to be done. Please, do it for your Dad."

return to awesome

Whooo! We're going back to Vietnam! Let's go celebrate at the Bum Boat!!!!

speculation

So many suicide foreshadows, and yet I really doubt that any harm is coming to Dr. Drew Corey. He's already been through so much - a two-week date with Vera during which he drank a mug of water, finding out that Vera faked him out about wanting to hook up again, and confessing his naive love only to get brutally rejected. Can't a man just hang out on a cliff and recoup?

I hope it doesn't take too much away from the man's sense of drama to point out that the cliff in question is only about 15 feet high; trees are taller than the road. Even if Dr. Drew Corey decides to really get "away from it all", the most action we can hope for is busting through that little fence and careening down the gentle slope beyond for like 1 second before landing unscathed on some grass. Hey, and how come, even though he showed up for his date in a checkered blazer and driving a pink SmartCar, he's driving away in a brown coat and a black car? Probably cause the date lasted so long his inspection sticker expired and he had to steal a car, so he just wore whatever they had lying around on the seat.

In all this time that we've been precoccupied with this hellish and bizarre dating scenario (meeting up with someone you're not interested in to tell them that you're now dating your boss), what do you suppose Mary's got herself up to?
-Planning Charterstone's annual pool party
-Holding Toby at gunpoint
-Munching away on that 20-lb bag of kibble she bought for Chester
-Feeding the ducks at the zoo
-Using a glass held against the wall to listen to her neighbors' conversations
-Making it in the staff lounge at the hospital with Dr. Jeff Corey